Hurry up and wait!

I guess this would be considered day #6 of my hospital stay.  I'm not sure how time can go by slowly and quickly at the same time but that's what it seems to be doing.  With a constant flow of visitors time seems to slip away a little faster...but then to stop and think about what's going on outside my little room and how much longer we might have time just got really slow.  My doctor came in this morning for a quick chat.  He's never quite as optimistic about my fluid levels as the nurses are but still is not alarmed by them.  My white blood count is still abnormal but getting better...which is just why I have to continue with taking antibiotics.  Yesterday in the ultrasound they saw her diaphragm moving for the first time so that's encouraging too.  Before my doctor left he said, "Now we just hurry up and wait!"  I had to laugh...that's the best way to describe it.  Do I want to fast forward through time right now and be home with all my girls...yes.  Is that the right thing for us to do right now...no.  And so we hurry and wait.

The girls are doing amazing.  They had Jon and Audrey here for the weekend.  Grandma is holding down the fort this week while Darran is at work a little more regularly.  Darran explained to me last night that they understand that I need to be here for the baby.  That we're excited for her to come but that she and I need to be in the hospital until she is really ready.  It's probably a good thing that time isn't something they can put their finger on.  They came by yesterday morning before church and then last night before heading to bed.  When they were here last night our ward came by to give me the sacrament.  I hadn't really thought I needed it...you miss the sacrament every now and then for various reasons so I thought I would be ok.  But when they started to say the prayer I started to cry.  The girls sat and watched and thought it was neat that we could do that.  I felt like Heavenly Father was giving me yet another indication that he is aware of me and my heart.

I had wonderful visitors yesterday...Brittany, Audrey and Jon, Lacey, and of course Darran and the girls.  Lacey shared with me a talk by President Eyring called O Remember, Remember from the 2007 October General Conference.  He talks about writing down each day how we have seen the hand of God reaching out to touch us or our children or our family.  It was something concrete for me to read that kind of gave my an answer to a thought I kept having.  I want to record these happenings and the way I'm feeling but more than anything I want a record of all these small miracles that keep occurring...evidences that Heavenly Father is so close to us during this.  I particularly loved this quote, "...the challenge to remember has always been the hardest for those who are blessed abundantly...with those blessings comes the temptation to forget their source.  It is easy to begin to feel the blessings were granted not by a loving God on whom we depend but by our own powers."  I have had an extremely blessed life.  But I don't want to forget that all of those blessings have come from the Lord.  And I especially don't want to forget during this time that when things become hard the Lord is still by my side...still showering me with blessings.  I may list some of those things I don't want to forget on our blog but I will also keep a personal record of them.  That way I can look back and know we are always blessed in one way or another.  Thanks Lacey!